Pregnant Again

Yes, we are pregnant again!

Shortly after March 1, the day Aria was suppose to be born, my pregnancy was confirmed. [I was pregnant the day my daughter was suppose to be born, what does that mean?] I wish that I could be excited and embrace the weight that I am putting on in record speed but I can't. Maybe it is fear of attachment? Unlike the last pregnancy, everything has been progressing well. There has been no unexplained bleeding and we hope to keep it that way. Unfortunately, I am still considered high risk. Since we received a positive pregnancy test, I have been going for ultrasounds weekly. Recently, my case was turned over from the reproductive endocrinologist to the neonatalogist. I am also seeing the general GYN. I wish I had time to find a new one because my blood pressure goes up every time I step foot in his office. Why do I have to tell the nurse every time I go, that I had a baby die at 20 weeks? Did I mention that this is the same nurse that I see every time I go to the office? I just feel like calling her names (poppy is the one who gets to hear me bitch after every appointments) oh yes, I am getting to the point of using dumb C-WORDS [no, I don't mean that guy's insecure wife-hahaha*] After the year I have had, I guess I should be grateful that I still find people comical and amusing. lol

My employer has been more thoughtful this pregnancy. I cannot seem to wrap my ahead around it. I appreciate that they are looking out for my best interests this time. However, it saddens me that my former boss had enough power over everybody to put me at risk. In the grand scheme of things, his goal was accomplished: he is now a big wig in D.C. I am sure that he never gave a thought to the roll he played in my baby's demise.

Oh well; live and learn: This time everything is different.

I will be seeing the neonatalogist April 24, 2009. Poppy and Cole think it is going to be a girl. I think Boy. Alex must think girl cause he said my feeling that it is a boy stems from the trauma experienced with Aria and that I might be wrong this time. Chinese calculator says girl too. hmm maybe I am wrong.



Statistics:
6 weeks 1 day: Heart Rate:109.21 BPM
8 Weeks 3 day: 158.50 BPM


9 weeks (pic below): 172.21 BMP


11 weeks (pic below): 172 BPM






The question remains: Aria, my angel, is it a boy or girl?